Updated: May 31, 2020
By Laxmi Parmeswar MA, MS, LPC
I try to look from a distance
Your careless glance
Your whimsical smile
You are a mere memory
Though vivid and powerful
I want to find you
I need you
I am weighed down
Yesterday’s mistakes
Tomorrow’s uncertainties
Losses, pain, broken spirit
Regrets, guilt, misfortune
Tears, trials, turbulence
Invading my space
Imprinting my psyche
I will unshackle those chains
Of self-loathing, of anger
At myself, and others
Of burdens, victimizations
By others and myself
I will try to find you
Find a way to be drawn
To you, my illusive ‘frienemy’
My evasive entitlement
I am in charge of you!
I will forgive myself
I will fight, I will prevail
With relentless faith
I will drink from the cup
Of optimism, of possibility
I must act, not brood
I must hope, not give up
I must wake up, not sleep
I see you more clearly
I will find you soon
I look within, I learn
To hold your steady gaze
I access you inside me
Liberating my soul
Re-imprinting my psyche
I CHOOSE you, I have FOUND you!